Clown Fruit “COLLEGE OF CHAOS” SWEATSHIRT | garment-dyed sweatshirt

An homage to the absurd, the tragic, and the eternally meme-worthy.

It’s official, Shave Cadets, you’ve been accepted to Clown College. Not that clown college, mind you, this one’s far stranger, far softer, infinitely more unhinged and located at the edge of the Phoenix Shaving Universe. Introducing the Clown Fruit “College of Chaos” Sweatshirt, our tongue-in-cheek tribute to Clown Fruit, John “Bluto” Blutarsky (think Belushi in Animal House), and the grand tradition of the unserious taking themselves way too seriously.

Yes, that’s right, this sweatshirt is an homage to an homage. Inspired by the legendary “COLLEGE” crewneck immortalized by John Belushi in Animal House, this Clown Fruit twist takes the joke even further down the absurdist rabbit hole. Think of it as Ivy League meets Interdimensional Carnival, where you major in Meme Mayhem, minor in Existential Laughter, and graduate with honors in Ridiculousness.

THE SWEATSHIRT ITSELF
From the moment you pull it on, it feels like a relic from another timeline, a vintage find from a thrift store in the Twilight Zone. The garment-dyed fleece gives it that perfectly broken-in look, like you’ve been wearing it through nine seasons of cult horror sitcoms and late-night paranormal reruns. The heavyweight fabric adds structure but never stiffness, soft, cozy, and slightly haunted.

Each sweatshirt carries subtle dye variations, meaning no two are exactly alike, just like Clown Fruit.

THE DETAILS

80% ring-spun cotton, 20% polyester

Garment-dyed 3-end fleece with a 100% cotton face

Heavyweight (9.5 oz./yd²)

Relaxed fit for that perfectly slouchy “I’m either plotting or napping” look

Forward-rolled shoulders, ribbed cuffs, and waistband

OEKO-TEX Standard 100 certified (yes, even chaos can be eco-conscious)

Ships separately, directly from Clown College HQ (aka not your regular box)

THE VIBE
This is more than a sweatshirt, it’s a statement. Vague as it is, it's still a statement.

Wear it while summoning the Clown Fruit spirit, mixing cocktails with CUBE, or rewatching your favorite 1980s paranormal documentaries.

NOTE:
Each sweatshirt undergoes a garment-dye and softening process, giving it that naturally faded, lived-in charm. Color variations aren’t flaws, they’re character.

CLOWN FRUIT “COLLEGE OF CHAOS” SWEATSHIRT
Because even madness deserves a mascot.

Available now, for those brave enough to major in Meme Mayhem.

This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!